I'm nearly 38, any one older than me been successful?
49 Replies
D, to Merlee - July 18

I had the same happen. I fell into all of the categories except something like heat. I couldn't afford the herbs for everything, so I just picked the top three worst to try and work on. I treated everything with the acupressure but the herbs only for my worst (yang issues, spleen deficiency, and blood stasis). I finally went to see an acupuncturist but the expense got to be a bit much at the time and so I stopped until after my second loss. Then I figured that THAT was an expense I couldn't afford. So, I cut back on going out for lunch and cut out my once a week girls night out. That allowed me to save the $65 a week I need for my current acupuncturist. This acupuncturist tells me the same thing the book does. That we should expect a month per year that we've had the problem. So, if we've had blood stasis issues for 2 years, we should expect it to take two months to start seeing changes, etc. Again, I know there's no guarantee. But I've never been one to simply sit back. I don't like docs much. I've been at this for a really long time, and I expect them to listen to what I have to say. I've fired three RE's in the past couple of years for not responding to me the way I expect them to. I'm about to start with a new one on 7/28. I'm very proactive and I aggressively pursue the steps that may help me. I have belonged to another group of ladies that are dealing with all sorts of infertility issues, and I've learned so much from them. So, when I go to the doc with info, I am very confident that I'm on the right track. It's why I love this. It allows me to take a portion of my care into my own hands. I hope it really helps you! Babydust to you and all the ladies here!

 

to danielle - July 18

first of all, age is a thing of the past, people are healthy and giving birth to healthy children in their 30's, 40's and even 50's....and how dare you say people have careers first that is not every ones case when there are many people who have tried for a long time and took on a career because what should you do sit and just wait, and now in america, there are many tests and research to help and prevent a baby being born sick or down sydrome, you cant blame somebody for God's destiny! that can happen at any age! could run in a family and has nothing to do with the advice this girl was seeking! get your facts straight before hurting people!

 

D. - July 18

Danielle,

Sorry hon. But I waited because I wanted to make sure that I could successfully support my child. I didn't want it on welfare, I didn't want to have to worry about where their next meal was coming from or whether they had proper clothes to wear. I also waited because I knew, when I was 20, that I had my life yet to live, and that at 20, I would not be as good a mother as I would be later. I knew, that at 20, the guy I was with would not likely be with me forever, and I knew at 20, that I should be an educated mother that her child could look up to and have a good role model. With your attitude, your child won't have much to be impressed by, I assure you. You have a little mind and I sincerely hope that you not conceive yet until you can offer your child someone with a better balance than coming to a forum where someone is looking for comfort and support and simply lash out. You're too young to know better, really. Of course, you won't understand any of this until much later in life. I hope. And I hope you remember your words when you're 50. Because you will be old too someday. And it's coming faster than you think. I'm glad your doctor won't help you. He's got more sense than most. You are not ready to have a child if you have to come here and attack us for actually thinking out what kind of life we want for our children. Or because we're trying later in life because circumstances didn't allow it otherswise: Ongoing infertility, meeting a mate that was balanced and secure, etc. It's true: Some of us have been at this a long time already. You should not judge. But you won't listen or care. That's OK. I'm done with you and I hope the others are as well. I won't reply to any more of your flaming posts.

 

D to Christine - July 18

And Christine, before she makes you worry: Our chances up to about 40 are less than 1 in 100. And after 40, it's about 1 in 100. So chances of baby being absolutey downs free is 99%. Great odds, don't you think?

 

to danielle - July 18

you are a real b**ch! and that is putting it nicley, mind your business if you cant say something nice to others! this is by far the craziest forum and people lack respect for others here when we are seeking advice and support, not cruelty and critism.

 

merlee to danielle - July 18

I will excuse your attitude b/c you must be very young and immature. But I will tell you the reason I waited "til the last minute". I never imagined that it would take this long to find the one man that I would live with and love for the rest of my life and start a family. I did not choose to wait, it just happened that way. I believe in family and would never have gotten pregnant just to have a baby b/c I wanted babies. I wanted a family, and I had to wait to get that. I have a wonderful husband and if we never have any children, we will be happy together. Now that it is "the last minute", I am trying to do everything possible to enhance my possibility of having children to enrich our lives. I hope that one day (probably many years from now) that you can understand an "older woman's" wish to be a first time mother and be a little more sensitive to people in general. But I'm pretty sure that you will never understand and will never be any more sensitive than you have been here.

 

Mimi - July 19

Danielle, whatever choices any of us make, whether to have children in our 20''s, 30's or 40's or even 50's, it's really our own individual choice. I was married at 20 and was not able to have a child until almost 30. And unfortunately, having a child with down syndrome might be a little sad, however, I know about 3 families who have children with down syndrom who are loving children, and to top it off, the mothers who gave birth to them were all in the 20's at the time. Please don't speak without knowing the facts and please, honestly, if u really don't have anything nice to say, please don't say it. If u cannot offer moral support, don't offer it. But please by all means do not put yourself in the position of a judge, for there is only one, and that is God. Read about him and perhaps you can learn to be more comforting to others.

 

christina - July 19

I am a teacher for pre k ranging from special ed, to normal pre k to down syndrome children, and i love them to peices! i am almost thirty and trying since my hubby and i were 22 and it is no joke! everyone's fate isnt in the cards to get pregnant right away, like the all american dream and some are, and no matter what God blesses us with, it is your child and nobody, i repeat nobody should ever say anything about age or sickness towards anyone else, and towards their life style! some people have to work these days two people need to in certain house holds, does that mean they are putting their careers first, no they want food on their table, clothing for family and to live! others can stay home, and thats great too. everyone is different and God's plan is different for all of us! christine you are still young, no worries it is gonna happen! three is a charm! mimi your child must be adoreable! come here for advice to share etc, vent, please dont come here with nonsense that is to those who are insulting any of us! thats why i come and go to this forum, you never know what is gonna be said and that is sad, ladies ignore the ignorant! baby dust to all NO MATTER what age we are!!!!!!

 

Lena - July 19

Merlee, that was a great post! I had the same thoughts and couldn't have said it better.

 

Mimi - July 19

Christina, thank you! I was blessed with 2 daughters, the other I had 4 days before my 35th birthday, and they are both truly a blessing. This is my second marriage and we are trying but nothing yet! I know all too well the heartache of trying and trying and the waiting. I admire u all for your strength and only wish to hear that you ALL will have your little ones. :)

 

Jodi - July 19

Hey!! I was 39 when I conceived and had my big girl (now 3) and 40 when I conceived and had my little girl (now 18 months) We are currently ttc #3 and I'm 42. I just experienced a blighted ovum - but my ob reassures me that I can do this one more time!!

 

Mimi - July 19

To Jodi. Thanx for sharing. I am now 40 and will be 41 in October. I guess it gives me hope. :) I did notice that I always got the ovulation pain and had alot of CM, however, in April was the last month that I experience much CM, even though I do get the ovulation pain. That is why I started to take the Ovulex because I read it could help with the CM. Good luck on baby #3 and many blessings to you and all! :)

 

christine - July 21

it is so reassuring to read so many success stories with the older women here. Thank you so much. There is hope and that's what i needed to hear.

 

christine - July 27

feeling down again. Any others want to share positive 'older' pregnancies with me? thanks for listening

 

KellyN - July 27

I'm nearly 37 and going for my first. Never been pg before, but am hopeful. As for good older women stories I know two women that had healthy babys after 40. My mom had her last child at the age of 42. Last year a friend of mine had her FIRST baby at 46. She got pg at age 45, but had a m/c. Then she went on to have a sucessful pg!!!! Gives us all hope! -kelly

 

To christine - July 27

Christine,

email me at [email protected] if you want. While I'm not a success story I can point you in a good direction.

 

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