NEED HOPE? Read my story! (Endo/IVF/Provera/Lupron/Clomid)
25 Replies
jg - December 27

Hi I am from Australia. After trying for 1 1/2 years my husband and I were told that because of severe endometriosis, blocked tubes, cysts etc that our prognosis what that under normal circumstances it would take us forty years to get pretty much were told we would not ever get pregnant. I had a number of operations to reduce the endo in the hope of getting pregnant naturally but to no effect. We then went on to the IVF roller-coaster. Five attempts in one year is about as stressful as life can get. Looking back now I wonder how we ever managed it. Injections, hormones, tears, ultrasounds, blood tests, lots of driving to and from hospitals (we live an hour away from the nearest IVF clinic), more tears, and more and more tears. It was just heartbreaking every time we failed. Our hopes would be so high each time (even though we tried not to) but it just wasn't happening for us. I HATED seeing other pregnant women . I was so jealous and felt that why should THEY have a baby and not me. It was a really really hard time. Anyway, after that year I had to have another op to clear the endo. We were fortunate to have a visiting specialist from the US perform the operation and she put me on to a strong medication (Luprin) not normally prescribed in Australia (she had to get special hospital and government permission to use it) to stop ovulation in the hope of keeping the endo at bay. Then after eight months the Lupron still had not worn off so I took Primula & Provera to induce a period. I took clomid and BANG, was pregnant - straight away!!!! WE COULD NOT BELIEVE IT. First time and that was it. We were stunned, amazed, in disbelief. I took a home pregnancy test, then when the two lines showed, checked the use by date on the box thinking it must be out of date. Five more home pregnancy tests and one at the doctors and it finally started to sink in. WE WERE PREGNANT. We got to six weeks and I developed strong pain. The hospital took a test and a follow up test a few days later. The pain eased and life went on. I rang the hospital for the test results and was told i would have to talk to the doctor. My heart started pounding and tears were stinging at my eyes wondering what was wrong. I eventually got hold of the doctor who told me that the test results showed that my hormone levels had dropped dramatically and the pregnancy would end very soon. I was in shock. I cried and cried until I could cry no more and then some, and blubbered to the doctor that it couldn't be right I felt fine and had no pain, no bleeding, nothing. She tried to explain that this could happen but the results definately showed that the pregnancy would end. Well.......about ten minutes later she rang me back to say she had contacted the lab to check the results and THEY HAD IT WRONG. The tests had been recorded in the wrong order and the hormone levels had in fact risen dramatically. Well by this time my husband and I were in total meltdown. We raced in to the gyno's office and had an early ultrasound test.....and there it was....a thumping little pulse, going strong at 126bms. I cried and cried and cried. What a day!! Everything went fine until we went away on holidays at 34 weeks, four hours away from the major hospital and went into early labour. I was flown by air ambulance to the major hospital and kept in for a week. Despite starting labour four times, with medication the contractions eased and I was allowed to fly back home. Got to forty weeks gestation....NOTHING, another day, NOTHING and another...and another.....eventually six days after my due date I gave birth to a healthy little boy. We still just can't believe it. So often I hold back tears (often non-successfully) as I look down at my beautiful baby boy sleeping, smiling, playing, talking. What an adventure. To go from being told we would never get pregnant, to doing so is just so amazing. That's my story. I do not regret a single thing that we did over those years in trying to get pregnant because now it all fades into insignificance when I look at my gorgeous little man. Good luck. If you want to chat please do so because I KNOW what it is like to lose hope over and over and over and to even feel like giving up. Don't give up hope. Do whatever you think is necessary to achieve your dream.


Moly - December 27

Thank you so much for sharing your story. What an inspiration! I am battling with hope at the moment. Have been ttc for 15 months, 4 rounds of Clomid and nothing. Soon to be off to the Sydney IVF clinic (I'm from Aus. too). My best friend told me she was 9 weeks pregnant on Christmas Day and they had fallen pregnant after 2 tries. When I went home I balled to my husband for half an hour. It hurt so much. then i felt horrible because I should be really happy for them! Anyway, thanks for giving us hope!


ashlee - December 28

jg, that story put tears in my eyes. im so happy that you have finally had the joy of having your own bundle of joy. That is so beautiful. i would have been so mad at the drs for getting the results wrong. You have proved to us all that there is indeed hope! thanks for sharing ur stroy. (hey, im for aus too!!! lol)


bj - December 28

thank you, jg. I am now on Lupron and sometimes I wonder if it is worth being on. Will it really help? I also have severe endo, so it was nice to hear your story. thank you, and God bless!


jg - December 28

MOLY Isn't it awful when friends tell you they are pregnant and all you want to do is slap them!!?? I know how hard it is to keep up a good face and deep down you really are happy for them but it is hard when you want what they have so very badly. My husband and I were trying for 4 1/2 years before it happened for us so keep trying! We used a branch of SIVF too and they were great and had some of the best success rates so you are on the right track!
ASHLEE You stay strong! If I could get through those years of trying then anyone can. I must have been dehydrated I cried so much! Yes I did get mad at the lab where the tests were done and wrote a very long letter of complaint and did get a reply but of course there was nothing that could truly make up for what had been done. But I don't even think of it anymore. You really will look back someday and all the pain you are experiencing now will be a distant memory.
BJ Lupron is awful hey! I felt like an old woman with all the symptoms of menopause - even had to go on HRT to help me cope with it all! Hot flushes, night sweats, emotional (like we aren't emotional enough anyway!!). But I would do it again in an instant to get the result we did. If I had to go through everything all over again to have another baby I would because now I know the absolute joy our baby brings. It's like labour, when that little baby is in your arms you don't remember the pain, it's just overwhelming happiness. It WILL be you some day. I am sure that without that last op and the Lupron then I wouldn't be a mummy now.


bj - December 28

thanks for all the positive words. have a great new year, and I pray God blesses you in every way.


Anna - December 29

Wow. what an inspiring story. It really gives ppl like me hope, especially when i dont even have it as bad as you did. I am so happy for you .


Jane - December 29

Really inspiring... thanks for sharing your story... god bless.


Cutie - December 31

Jg! Congrats, and thank you so much for sharing.....I cried when I read your story....I've been so down :( TTC for almost year and a half and no luck, going in for laparoscopy on Jan 19th ....Hopefully will help. God bless you


dea - December 31

jg: Thanks for sharing. You give my stamina to keep going and to not lose hope. Blessings to you and your family.


jg - January 1

Hey! It's hard not to lose hope eh! Everytime we failed IVF and every month that some new technique didn't work we just spiralled further and further into despair. But, you get back up and try again and again and again and even though in our case we thought nothing would ever work we just kept on at it. And I could find no encouraging stories to just give that little bit of hope, so I really hope my story inspires you to just keep on at it as long as you are mentally, physically, emotionally able.


ashlee - January 1

jg u r a great and a strong person. i cant believe it i found out last week that i am pregnant. aboiut 5w5d now. sooooo scared of having anothe m/c though!!! baby dust to all of you. you deserve ti!!!


jg - January 2

ASHLEE that is so fantastic!! You must be absolutely thrilled but scared as well no doubt. Try as much as possible to relax and enjoy this time - you deserve it after all the stress!!


ashlee - January 3

Thanks jg! god bless!!! xo


bj - January 3

Congratulations Ashlee!!!!!!! I haven't been on since before Christmas, so it was good to hear good news like that.


ashlee - January 3

Thankyou soo much bj!!! so excititng!!! hope you get soem great news soon too!!!


jg - January 7

ASHLEE how are you going? Hope you are okay and everything is going smoothly for you.



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