Feeling very lost and confused, what now???
155 Replies
mg - December 31

My DH and I have been trying to conceive for 1 year with no success. I went to an OB thinking I wasnt ovulating and just needed Clomid (I only have one ovary) and found out my husband has a sperm count of 38million with a <1% mobility. Our OB refferred us to a fertility specialist. We are praying that this is just a lab error, I did drop the sample off late a night in the lab, but if its not what do we do!!! Our insurance will not cover ANY kind of fertiltiy treatment or diagnosis, and our first intial consultation for fertility treatment will be $200 + each. I have heard that fertility treatment can cost thousands of dollars and can be an emotional nightmare. I just feel very sad and lost right now, and I just dont know what to do. Has this happened to anybody, and if so what are my options for treatment and financing? Should we just start to look into adoption or at least try fertiltiy? Any support will help.


jcr - December 31

Our neighbor had the same issues, had 1 baby IVF, got pg naturally with 2nd baby-only thing different was hubby drinking green tea?????


m - December 31

Thats interesting. I will look into that.


dea - January 1

Hi MG: Your dh's count looks good. Was the <1% moBility or moTility? Motility is the sperm's ability to swim "straight" where he's supposed to go. I would also suggest you do another sample before making any kind of financial decision. The lab can sometimes get is wrong OR if DH was sick/on meds it can effect the sperm sample. Also too- try to do the analysis right after (dh gives sample in the lab). That will give the best information. Hope some of this helps....


mg - January 1

My brain was just numb when I was talking to the MD, but I think the sperm were not moving forward. I am really hoping this is a lab error. We had 30 minutes to get the sample to the hospital and I got it there in 20 minutes. It was late at night and I am not sure the 18 year old behind the counter knew what to due with the sample. I guess they send it out to another lab across town to due the final testing (after they stablize it) He was sick at the time with just a stomach viral thing, but it only lasted a day or so. I hate to say this but my only hope is that 9 years ago he was able to get his ex wife pregnant twice (she miscarried and he doesnt have any childern) but that fact that he was able to get somebody pregnant is hopeful. Dea you said that his sperm count looks good, I thought that was a low number?


jcr - January 1

I have this book called the infertility cure. It is all about eastern medicine mostly acupuncture and herbs. It is really interesting, and if I get a bfp in the next few days I owe it to my acupuncturist and this book. It has several suggestions for improving sperm motility. The author is Randine Lewis. I think you can google her name and get lots of info from her website. She sounds like an amazing woman, trained in both western and eastern medicine. She also went to China to learn. It is a very inspiring book. Even go to borders and pick it up and read the chapter on Male infertility. You will probably get some good ideas, and it is much cheaper than all the other stuff. Hang in there and good luck.


mg - January 1

Does anybody even know what a normal sperm count is? My MD said 60 million-200million, but everything I have read from the WHO to JAMA has said anything above 20 million is normal.


dea - January 1

MG: I've seen that anything above 20 Million is good, too. My DH had a count of 3.5 Million after combining TWO samples. YIKES!! But we are working on increasing his counts. 1000 mg of Vitamin C and 50 mg of zinc everyday can boost levels. We will find out soon... How would DH feel about giving the sample in the lab? We have always went through it by literally filling the jar, stepping out of the room and handing it to the Dr. He put it in a mini "heater" to keep it good. When we did the samples for IUI they were ready in a couple of hours. We have been to the facility a half dozen times. Usually drs. will want more than one sample to see if the counts/motility/morphology are constant. Keep going and ask a lot of questions. Be your own advocate. Sometimes drs. keep you spinning your wheels for nothing! Let me know what happens!


mg - January 3

So do you think I should call my OB again and tell him what I found out in my reasearch that 20 million is OK? see if I go to the fertiltiy clinic I have no insurance and have to pay $200 + if I go through my OB it is covered. Maybe I should ask him to order another sperm analysis, and this time do it right at the main lab . If my DH numbers arestill off then we can go to the fertiltiy clinic. My appt. with the fertitliy clinic is on the 11th, so we could do another test, and if its still bad we will still have our appt on the 11th. If its good I still have time to start Clomid this month!! What do you think??


dea - January 3

MG: I think you should go back to the OB and ask for another analysis. But- I wouldn't tell him that you found out 20 Million is OK. (Every Dr. has there own standards. Some Drs. won't do an IUI without at least 5 Million and DH and I did it with 3.5.) We were lucky... I'm surprised your Dr. didn't set you guys up with an RE or Urologist. That's what happened with us. Once the SA came back stinky we were set up right away. That Dr. order three more SA's! Keep going through your Dr. so it's covered. Here's another thought: I've seen "kits" at the drug store to check sperm. You might want to consider that... If you do another SA- I would highly recommend DH does the sample there. Also- having the flu, an infection, too much of one thing, not enough of another can effect counts/motility/morphology...so keep these factors in mind. That's why a lot of times Drs. order more that one SA-- to get an overall look at the sperm.Best of Luck!


Ann - January 3

Hi mg. I think we all on the board feel your pain! I know it is tough, but you are not alone. Also, I would call around to check the prices for the analysis if you want to have it done elsewhere. We found a clinic right by our house and it was $125. Good luck!


mg - January 4

I talked with my MD agian today, and he said that 60% of the morphology of the sperm are abnormal. He also said that each lab has there own set of lab values, and that he was more concerned about the mobility and morphology then the number it self. He thinks that it is best to have another SA done at the fertility clinic rather then his lab since they are more high tech. Get this- last week he even went and visited the fertility clinic he reffered us to, just to see what type of testing they have there and to see how private it was. He a very nice OB, he told me to research like crazy and ask a lot of questions to either the fertility clinic or him. I just cant help but to feel angry and hopeless. I feel bitter towards my DH and mad at the world. It is just not fair.


mg - January 4

Funny thing happened, just for fun last night I took a HPT (some habits are just to hard to break!!!LOL) Anyways, I tossed the strip last night in the trash next to a can of Diet Rite (it spilled on the test strip), I came back today and saw a BIG fat positive!!! So apparently I cant get a BFP but my Diet Rite can !! Just alittle cynical morning humor!! You guys have been great, and it really helps me to know that I am not alone!!


Melissa - January 4

Wow, you seem to have a double whammy with having the one ovary and your husband having issues as well. I say treat each issue seperately. Doe shaving the one ovary mean that you ovulate every other month? Look into adoption while at the same time treating the infertility issues, at least that way, you are doing everything you can. As far as the expense of fertility treatments, I know that can be too much of a financial burden for most people (including myself). A loan pehaps??


Ann - January 4

This is a bit of a stretch for a solution. I don't know what you and your husband do for a living or if you live in an area with a good job market, but would switching jobs be an option for either of you? My insurance will cover pre-existing infertility as long as you had another medical insurance for the previous 90 days. It sounds like you have insurance now, but that it just won't cover infertility. It might be worth a job switch for one of you to a company with better medical insurance. Also, you didn't say if you are ovulating or not. I know it isn't usually a big problem to get pg if you only have one ovary, if it is functioning normally. Good luck!


dea - January 4

Hi MG: Now morphology too!!! Is you DH on any meds??? That can mess with the sperm. My DH has issues with morphology and counts. I researched and found that many meds (esp. hypertension ones) mess up sperm. It takes 60 days for the sperm to form....so we have been off the meds about that long- this is the first month that will be med free and the sperm have been forming w/o meds interferring. Your Dr. sounds awesome/supportive. I'd stick with him. MG: you are not alone. I have had anger and resentment towards people who conceive quickly (and don't "deserve" it). It's tough- I know. The best words I can offer is to say... Focus on your issues. They can be worked out. You will get pregnant. You will love your child all the more because of the road you had to take to get there. The anger will subside. Trust in science (and a bit of God, if that's your thing)- things will work out. Keep going and definately be your own advocate. (If DH and I waited for Drs. he would still be on the meds.) Good luck- keep me posted! ~~DUST~~


mg - January 5

I have no idea if I am ovulating or not, thats how we got into this whole mess. I went to the MD to start Clomid, and my MD said we needed a SA first. I had an ultrasound a month or two ago, and everything looked fine-I had great eggs!. My Dh is not on any meds, he a big vitamin person. We have great insurance, but like most they just dont cover fertility treatments. I just feel SOOO depressed about this, I am angry towards others and my DH, its like he handling this so much better then me, and it just makes me want to beat him (LOL), I feel like he is the reason we are in this mess, and should at least show some emotions!! I am so mean, I feel terrible. I just heard Britney Spears is pregnant again, I about had to pull my car over to puke. I am a researcher in Molecular Biology, I should understand everything and really trust science-yet I have never felt so hopeless before in my life.



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