Want a baby so bad....becoming depressed...
6 Replies
inlove96 - July 1

Help. I am 25 and have been wanting a baby for years now. My husband and I have been together for 10 years and married for 2 months now. I have medical problems (beta strep and endo) which are causing my doctors to say have a baby now. But my husband says he is not ready.
I want a baby so bad and if something were to go wrong and I can not later I will go nuts.

Is this normal to feel so depressed about wanting a baby. I actually feel my tummy and wish something would happen. I wish my husband would let me get off the pill.


manyika - July 1

Does your husband know about your medical problem? Does he have any desire at all to start a family? If he does, try to explain to him how you feel and he may understand. You are still young but time flies so fast and before you know it you will be in your 30's and it will be more depressing if you struggle to have a baby.


inlove96 - July 1

Thanks for writing back. Yes, my husband does know. He was there when I had my surgeries. I don't want to keep hounding him to the point that he divorces me. I just wish he knew how BAD I want this. And i swear everyday I see cute women walking around all pregnant and cute and I get more depressed.

My main fear is that by next year for some reason if he is ready, it will be too late. The docs say everything should be fine, but i am still worried. I am on continuous BC so that should help stop any bad stuff from happening.


manyika - July 2

Did he give you the reason why he's not ready? Perhaps, he's worried about your health. You said that you're on continuous bc to help stop bad stuff from happening. If you stop taking the pill the symptoms of your endo might return and probably that's the reason why he wouldn't let you get off the pill. I know how it feels to want a baby so bad and like you, I get jealous when I see pregnant women. Sometimes I feel that it's just not fair. But you know what, there's always a reason for everything and there are situations that are just beyond our control and all we can do is to wait and have faith. The good news is that you seem to have a husband who loves you. Try to relax and not worry too much. I've watched a lady that had a bad case of endo and got pregnant with ivf and gave birth to twins in the Discovery Health channel and she was already in her 30's. You are only 25, so don't feel depressed and try to stay positive.


kristina1980 - July 2

Hi, My boyfriend didn't want to hear about a baby at all. Money, Insurance, time,....etc. I stopped talking about it completely for a year or so, and just focused on my school and work. Three months ago, I just kind of announced that I am getting off BC, because I heard it might take up to one year for your body to get clean and ready. He took it OK, and doesn't do anything against conception. With your medical problem (I am not an english native speaker, so sorry if I mess up some spelling or so) I watched also on Discovery channel, that one lady had really bad endo problems, and doctors didn't want her to get of BC, but she did, and really watched herself and already kind of gave up hope for having kids. And when she didn't expect it all she became pregnant, and two years later again, and she was in her early 30's. I want baby too, a lot, and feel jealous if I see pregnant women around me. But as I said, I am trying to do other things, such as sport, school, work, etc. and it helps a bit. Good luck.


inlove96 - July 2

Thank you so much for your responses. I am glad to see I am not alone. I just want to cry sometime cause I want it so bad.

He does have reasons for not wanting one yet.
1. he says we are too young. (not too young when i have health problems)
2. he thinks he will be pushed out of the picture. I will love the baby more and not care about him. And that is because his mom raised him that way. He is the only child and his mom has some problems when he was young so it was only them two for a long time.

I wish I could get into his head and tell him all the things I am thinking. I feel I am so unattractive and pregnancy will not happen if I wait. I don't know. :(

I know there are ways around things but I swear every time I see a beautiful pregnant woman I want to cry.


cspears99 - July 3

Hi I am 32 and have wanted a baby for a while, we have been trying for 2 years and on our 3rd cycle of fertility, its very depressing, I know its awful but I hate everyone that is pregnant and hate its not me, all of my friends are getting pregnant which is extremely difficult and emotional for me, I am so happy for them but very sad for me, but if its meant to be it will happen, postive vibes I really hope everything works for you! my ultrasound is tomorrow hoping for lots of eggs. Good luck!!



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