40 Replies
Teena - August 18

Thank you for your responses. It has been hard knowing what to say and to tell you the truth, the first thing that has always wanted to pop out of my mouth is just what you all don't want to hear. Thanks for your comments and thoughts though. It helped. The best to all of you!


merlee - August 18

I need to vent too! I have a friend who just got off the pill to try, hoping she would get preg. in a year or so. She never even had her first period after stopping the pill! She just had her first appointment and u/s (She brought pix of her 4 inch "blob"). I am happy for her and anyone else who is and wants to be preg. But I wanted it to take a little longer for her. We have been ttc for 3 yrs this Sept. (we started on our first anniversary). And today I found out that a girl at work, who has a 3 yr old and just had a baby in Feb., is preg - and didn't want to be - it was a surprise!!! She is okay with it, but they had not planned to have any more after the last. When will it be my turn?!? I am sooo frustrated!! Every once in a while I get freaked out and really depressed and desperate when I realize that I am 37 yrs old and still working on our first. And I see preg. women EVERYWHERE! Last Halloween a neighbor had her first baby after ttc for 8 yrs. She told me "it will happen to you, too". That baby will be a whole year old in just 2 months from now and I am still no further along in my quest for a baby than I was then. These thoughts make me desperate! WHEN will it happen to ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


kay g - August 23

I know exactly how each one of u feel. i am in the same boat . I have been ttc for over a year now and nothing!!! It is sooo frustrating having people ask all the time "so when are u going to have kids" like I don't want any!!! argggh! and saying how lucky i am to not have kids! If only they knew! and these are the ones who have no problem getting preg and look at their children as a burden and not a GIFT!! I just want to be a MOMMY:((((


bump - August 23



sophie - August 23

Im so glad im not the only one who thinks this way. I thought i was being selfish when other peoples pregnancies disappointed me. I hate the way some people treat their children and tell you how lucky you are not to have children. My husband and i waited so that we were financially stable before we ttc. Now i think maybe we shouldnt have. I hate being punished for being responsible and i hate it when people are rewarded for being irresponsible.


KC - August 23

Sophie - I couldn't have said it better myself. I feel like I'm being punihed also. All I do it do everything right. I eat right, I don't do drugs, drink only on occasions and have at most 2 drinks, don't smoke, take my vitamins, exercise, go to all my doc appointments. All I want is to have a baby. My brother and sister in law can't even take care of themselves. They are selfish and are more interested in their parties, drinking, smoking and video games than their three beautiful children. In fact, they make their 8 year old stay up until 2 or 3 in the morning on school nights. Make him go to school tired at 8 am then they go back to sleep until noon. When he comes home from school they leave him nap from 4 to 7 or 8 and keep him up until 2 again. Their other two babies are on this same schedule. There ages are 1 year and 22 months. Yep she got pg before her post partum check-up. I've been ttc all for a year and a half. Very difficult to deal with. The kids are always dirty, she's afraid they will get "fat" so she limits what they eat. Note they are all underweight. But her and my brother are overweight. It's just not fair.


and - August 23

I didn't mean to step on your toes. I was refering to myself, but maybe you are bit too since you are the only other person who took it as a personal statement about you.


MAS - August 23

To KellyN, thank you for the link to the other site. I will definitely look into it.


Mrs Vent - August 24

Heard of another 2 woman who have fallen pregnant!! This is just crazy!! It's like all their partners do is stare at them and they fall pregnant!! I have spoken with DH and we decided that I am not going to chart my temps or check when I ovulate and just try to relax and try to concentrate on our marriage and find things to keep us happy and healthy. The stress of checking the above every single month has taken it's toll on me. Especially today, feeling cramps as my periods are definitely on their way. We have also decided if nothing happens by Dec. we are going to do IVF. Saying that, we are not telling a soul! We have a few months to get outselves emotionally ready for the biggest rollercoaster of our lives. And to Sophie, I completely understand where you are coming from!! We thought we would wait a couple of years to be financially stable, we now know we shouldn't have as it's been a few years since making that descision. But who thought we would be this situation?? I too feel like I am being punished for waiting and for the problems I have had to deal with. DH is very supportive and always tells me - "Everyone has a cross to bear and God will only give you what you can handle". Guess God knows when my time is coming. I think my major flaw is control. In my profession and my life I am control freak and everything I have ever wanted I got through hard work and I just have to snap out of this situation as I obviously can't control it.


CambridgeKate - August 24

One more vent. I'm 38, TTC#1. Between the "don't stress/think about it" and the "you should really start trying" comments I could scream almost everyday! And there are also the folks who mention how they could NEVER adopt, and I haven't even brought up the topic! Ditto to what everyone else has said/vented. I don't know if it's worse from colleagues, distant friends, relatives, or closer friends. If I had control over being pg, I would be!



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