New and Need Friends that Understand
11 Replies
Mel - August 24

My friend told me that I should find somewhere that I can talk to people that are in the same boat as me. I have been ttc for 6 years now. We have not been able to do any medical testing or medication because we have not insureance at this time. I was dx with pcos about 3 years ago but not put on anything. Before I lost our medical insurance (got let go from work) I was put on Mediformin but I was only able to take it for 1 month. I do not have normal AF. I really want to have a baby and it is getting more and more of a want each day. Everywhere I look friends, family, strangers are pg. I am happy for them and but all I do when I find out is smile for them and then that night cry myself to sleep. My bestfriend just had a baby and it was really hard because she was trying to be nice and not talk to me about it so that I would not feel bad but really that hurt more I think then if she would have told me what was going on. I just don't know what to do anymore. If we could go to the doctors then maybe we could start tests and find out what we need to do but we can not pay for it. I have been looking for a new job but no luck so that makes more stress in my life. As I sit here typing this and crying I just don't understand how people that do not want kids or who are on drugs can pop out kid after kid and people like me and others I have read are having trouble. I would love to have some friends that understand. Please let me know what you think. Good Luck to all.


amanda - August 24

me and my dh have been ttc for 18mons...we havent gone to a fertility specialist yet because we really want to get pregnant without fertility drugs.. we havent told any of r family and friends that we r ttc because i wouldnt be able to stand people asking if it happened yet or looking at me with pity because it just wont happen..the only down fall of not telling people is that now everyone i know that gets pregnant (i know 6 people who r pregnat now) just blurt it out and constantly talk about it while i just sit there and try not to start crying.. i cant even feel happy for them anymore,so of course that makes me feel like a bad person!! i dont have normal af either usually only about 6 a yr,i went to the gyno about it in november and she drew blood and had me have a ultrasound and everything came back normally so i dont know what is wrong!! just try to keep ur faith up and hopefully it will happen for all of us.. maybe u could try some of the fertilty aids u can buy (without perscription) thats what we r trying now..So GOODLUCK!!


Mel - August 24

Thanks for the advice. I know there are things that we could do and strange things like someone told me to drink cough med to help. I was just talking to a friend of mine and she told me that I should stop trying because if I do get pg I would not have any insurance for the baby or me and with my medical history and the fact that I am diabetic it would not be good. (easy for her to say she has kids and a great job and more money then she knows what to do with.) I know that is true but it does not stop that feeling in your heart that empty space that can only be filled with a baby. I sit around dreaming of the day that I will have a baby to take care of. A little bit of me and a little of my dh. We are celebrating our 6 year anniversary this weekend and I wish I could give him what I know he really wants. Oh and to top it all of we just found out that his brother's wife is haveing their 2nd child. Let me tell you this is not going to be easy.


kay g - August 24

Hi Mel... you are far from being alone in this. I also have been ttc for over a year w/h my dh and it does get difficult day by day.. But I try to find comfort by knowing that GOD can do all things and he creates life!!:) I know it can get hard. I had a post also titled(depressed) it was one of my bad days we all have them. Just try to find comfort in knowing u r not alone and God is truly good and he will bless you. Just believe and keep faith he will come through for u and me!!!:)


merlee - August 24

Hi Mel. My DH and I have been TTC for 3 yrs with no luck so far. I do not want to use fertility drugs b/c since I started ttc I have been researching infertility. I have "unexplained" infertility and have had all the tests. I feel that the fertility drugs will not help me and then I will just be an emotional mess (more so than now) and broke, too. So I have turned to herbal remedies. I got the book "the infertility cure" and have a greater understanding of how my body works. I now feel like I am actually doing something to help instead of just wishing. The herbal remedies could also help your diabetes to some degree. Give the book a try and good luck.


K - August 25

Hey Mel. I know what you're going through. My sister has a 1 yr old dd, a 2 year old dd, and a 12 yr old ds. I've been trying for almost 3 years now. You gotta hang in there and try your best to be happy for others that are blessed. I know its hard, but try to stay in a "When it's my time, it'll happen" state of mind. That's what I do every month. I concentrate on keeping my marriage sane. Can't let the stress of trying to conceive run your life. I wish you all the luck in the world hun!! Stay strong.


Mel - August 25

Thanks for all the support.


MelissaS - August 25

Hi Mel. I have found to be a lot more understanding and helpful. You should try that. I moved over (with a couple other girls) after too many inconsiderate comments were made on here. GL


bump - August 25



up - August 29



Angie - August 29

Hi Mel. I'd like to suggest a book called "Taking charge of your fertility" by Toni Weschler. It's excellent. The chapter on fertility achievement will at least give you more information and put you in control of the situation. I was trying for a year and getting really depressed about it also but with the book I was able to figure out exactly when I was ovulating (not what I thought) and what signs to look for before you ovulate and when you'll be fertile. The book gives considerations and information for just about every situation you can think of. At least this way you'll know what's happening with your body and what steps you can take to fix whatever is in the way. I'm now expecting and apparently if there's no serious medical issues, women usually conceive within 4 months of starting to chart. I found the book in the public library so yours should have it too. I hope this can at least give some hope and I wish you all the luck in the world! Good luck:)


Mel - August 29

Thanks for the tip. I will look for the book this week. I have also started to use another web site that gives you free charting. E-mail me at [email protected] if you would like more info.



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