i dont understand, PLEASE HELP ME.......!
14 Replies
hopeful99 - March 29

hi everyone i just wanted to see if anyone is in the same boat. me and my guy have been trying to concive for like 6 months and we have tried ovulation calanders and i know my cycle its very predictable and we always have intercourse when im ovulating we try our best to really hold off till my most fertile days but unless i have been making a serious mistake in my calculations than i dont know what i am doing wrong im only 24 years old and he is 25 all of my friends are telling me that i have nothing to worry about but i feel that it should have happned by now and i cant help but feel that there is something wrong with me, i dont know if i should tell my doctor and have her do tests on me. im just so worried that this will never happen for me. its even harder for me because my best friend and my boyfriends brothers girlfriend (same girl) are having a baby in three months, and it happned for them right away, which is even more discouraging, i just need some advice i know he really wants a baby and so do i im just afraid that for whatever reason im not going to be able to give him the family he wants so much. please help.


Jaqi - March 29

why don't you get married first and then do the baby thing.


Sweetpea - March 29

I'd try an OPK, just because you're cycle is predictable doesn't mean that you're ovulating when the calendars say you should.


hopeful99 - March 29

well jaqi heres the thing we have been together for 7 years living together for 51/2 of thoes years and we dont want to get married so thats why we are totally open to having kids right now but we are both looking at marriage the same way that its not really fo us we have been together long enough that we know we are committed enough to eachother to have a baby and not be married


crystal - March 29

hey hopeful99,
your married in gods eyes and in your hearts, that's all that matters. u don't need a silly little piece of paper to tell you that. but i would suggest that u two go to the doctors and get checked out. wouldn't hurt to know what's going on with u two. i am young also. 22 and my husband is 26. we've been ttc for 10 months now. never was on birth control except for 9 months out of the first four years and no conception. we did use a lot of recreational drugs though. so maybe that had a lot to do with it. but we're both clean and have been checked out, and they say we're fine, just keep trying. get's frustrating though. so my point is that i think you both should go get checked out, that way you know and your not playing geussing games. i wish the best for you two. good luck on that baby


Sweetpea - March 29

Jaqi, don't worry about the marriage comments you might get. I'd tell you to wait until you were married ig you were 18 or so but I believe your old enough to know what you want. I've known people who were married and divorced in less that two years and have also known people who have been together but unmarried for over 30. Sometimes people don't marry for financial reasons, some because of different religions, and others just because. I think if you're in a serious commitment, willing to stand together for the sake of a child, and aren't a teen (who always swears that they're mature for their age, which that may be ture but I think they're dealing with other issues as well.) then you should be able to do whats right for you, whatever that may be!


ConfusedMom2B - March 29

What a rude comment, Jaqi. What made you say that? I'm not married, and my fiance and I are trying to conveive. You don't have to be married to try to have a baby, thank you.


a - March 29

Maybe it isn't a timing problem. Maybe it is time for your partner to go in for a sperm analysis. I'm no expert though.


Ann - March 29

I agree with sweetpea that you should use opks. Also you should check your cervical fluid for signs of ovulation. Then, make sure to BD around O time. Just because you have say a 28-day cycle, doesn't mean you O at day 14. It may be sooner or later, so your timing could just be off. I would make sure your timing is correct and then see someone after you try for a while longer with for-sure correct timing. Also, you should BD a couple days before you O so the sperm will be waiting for the egg. Good luck!


bluejada.uk - March 29

talk about impose ur view (jaqi)....lol oh well hopeful99 there had to be one didnt there lol......id also say make an apt with ur doc! i know it can feel like the begining of the end but it really isnt, if nothing else they will be able to rule out a few things (hope that was a bit of help)


Donna - March 29

I have also been trying for a baby for 6 month its hard i have one child i fell with him as soon as i tryed i;m 26 and worried i've left it two late i was on the pill for 7 years.


ula - March 29

most doctors wont test you until after 1 year at your age. You only have 10-20% chance every month and that is if everything is perfect. It can take 1-2 years of perfectly timed intercourse to get pregnant. Try and relax, use your opk's, check cervical mucous, cervical postioning, and start basal body temperatures. If after 3-4 months of temps you notice a problem take them into your doctor and then have him run tests. It's cheapest to get your guy tested first for his sperm. Go to www.fertilityfriend.com to get learning about bbt. Dont worry your so young still and 6 months is usually the earliest people get pregnant. My doc said under 6 months is totatally abnormal and lucky.


Nikki - March 29

Hopeful99, I know how you feel. I went to my doctor after six months (it's now been 8) and he told me to wait until it had been a year. He also said that six months wasn't unusual at all, but it actually didn't make me feel any better. Well, maybe for about five minutes, but that night AF showed up and what he had said didn't help at all! I think we all just get too worried about all this TTC stuff, but its hard not to! After all, it concerns the most important aspect of our lives!
But there's no need to panic yet, just start checking your fertility signs in whatever way you prefer, and pretty soon you should know more about your cycle and then it will be easier for you to identify the problem (if there is one).
And forget about the silly marriage comment!


Sweetpea - March 29

Yeah my post was for hopefull not Jaqi... I get confused at times. Anyway just thought you'd like to know that if you go into your doctor they're going to ask for 2-3 months of basal body temeperatures first. so If you start doing them now and use OPK and write down when you ovukate, CM, and temps long before you make your appointment it will speed things along if you haven't already concieved by then.


JenG - March 30

Hi Hopeful99! First, the two times I conceived were the only months I was 'refocused' and did not think that was a month we were truly trying. We ttc sort of recklessly if you know what I mean. And we have predictable cycles but was seeing an RE and did fertility the other months etc. So, relax... and perhaps try the "every other day" approach for 2 -3 more months... start of the 10th day of your cycle, sex every other day and go until you about to start your period. Some docs even say 3 times a week. I few friends with no fertility issues suceeded that way, fool proof. Your boyfriend will like it too! If that does not work... start basil charting and developing the tracking that you are hitting on the mark and still nothing. At that point... if nothing transpires, you will have the amo your doc needs to get you started on tests. Hope this helps.



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