Help Me!!! Am i the only one going through this!!!
12 Replies
Maya - October 9

I feel very depressed. We are ttc for the past 4 months with no luck. first month having sex was ok for us after that problems started we are not able to enjoy this ttc sex anymore. My husband is under lot of pressure and he is not able to perform well anymore he wasn't like this before. Every time i get my af it is killing me and the next cycle ttc is getting even harder for both of us.

This month it has turned into a total nightmare my dh is totally scared of having sex he is afraid that he is going to fail and it is going to upset me more and i am going to cry for the whole day. I am ovulating rightnow and i don't know how to get him into the mood. Guys pl help if there are any tips or suggestions on how to make this more enjoyable and less painful. I can't take this stress anymore i just feel like i want to die.

Is there any way for us. I can't even talk to my friends or family about this they don't understand what we are going through and on top of that the looks on their faces it will kill me.



Rowan - October 9

Maybe he should try viagra. That mgiht bring back his confidence so he won't have to worry about failing and he will able to perform during that every so critical ovulation time. I'm not saying that this will work, but it's worth a shot.


to maya - October 9

Just wondering do you tell your partner when you are o'ing? Because my thought is if he doesn't know then he might not feel under pressure to rise to the occassion. If that doesn't work i assume most men are turned on if the woman makes the first move, if you are comfortable with this try it along with some sexy underwear!! Or plan c a weekend away with no mobile phones!


me - October 9

TTC can be heartwrenching. Please keep in mind that it can take a normal couple 6 months to a year to conceive naturally. If you are temping and monitoring your cm and such with no success, then you can go to a specialist before a year is up. My advice to try to keep it fun and not a chore. You know when you are supposed to ovulate, right? So the week before and leading up to O day, tease him a bit every day and have some fun sex. Do this every couple days so he won't know when you are ovulating. If AF comes that month, it will be disappointing, but keep in mind that it can take the normal couple 6 months to a year to conceive. As for your hubby, explain to him that you are in this together, and there is no one to blame. If something is wrong with his sperm, you have other options, such as IUI or IVF. Try not to get upset when AF comes. I know it is hard to do. Hope that helps a bit. Good luck!


M'Rita - October 10

I know what you mean girl! I went through something similar, but I've realized that I have to change! I stopped telling DH my ovulation time, and stopped going on and on about conceiving. We were just having sex because we wanted to and we had fun!
Someone said that men are like dogs...U have to take ur dog for a ride in the car every week and not just when u r taking him to the vets, or he won't even sit in the car. I guess the same with men, they don't like pressure and they are not robots that they can just turn on and do the deed!
Try and be spontaneous, and just enjoy your self, when u do get PG, you'll look back and think that the baby was conceived with love & passion. Good luck to you honey!
Love xxx Rita 6w+6d


bp - October 10

maya i have same situation , problem is he doesnt enjoy sex and he never cum !!! i feel so silly i can have love making for hours but he stop after 15 min and he never cum so i guess i have even less chance than you to get PG is sad but i guess maybe making it fun would be one of the last chance!


goerg - October 10

You not the only one..My wife m.c at 14 wks..So we waited 2 cycles before TTC..Ok her first cycle we tried once 3 days before ovulation..nuthing happen. For 2nd cycle...on her ovulation week..I didn't get enuff sleep and totally have zero sex drive..We suppose to TTC on Wed but my p*nis went to hibernate mode..Thr I was in panic and went to see Dr, which prescribed me Viarga..Fri nite (she start having lots of discharge) I took Viarga but nuthing happen for 1hr 30mins..After that we tried but nuthing..I was able to TTC but no cum..Gave up and went to sleep..At around 2AM I got so dizzy and like a super fever..It was a totally disaster..I felt like I was gonna die..Thank goodness feel better on Sat morning..This time she really have major eggwhite discharge..We TTC like mad couple at many tried but finally I day her temperature shot up so know she ovulated. So we did TTC either before/right at ovulation...Now at 16dpo and started her AF...I am so much effort wasted for nuthing..To make it worse I am getting older and my sex drive is so low..I am gonna see a Dr..and currently trying to take something called Natural V (sexual enhancer)..I am not sure I will able to perform at next cycle..We still TTC for #1 child and no light at end of tunnel..


TO goerg - October 10

whichkind of DR gave that pill(sexual enhancer).. to you ? did you take it already ? my husband used to take somthing and he was always sick and dizzy with it so he stpoed i guess im gone safe some money and do it in other way!


CJ - October 10

Maya-I definitely know what you are going through. We have been ttc for a year now. I am on Clomid now to help me O. My husband has trouble having sex on demand and finishing the deal when we do have sex. But while I'm on the Clomid I feel like we have to try extra hard b/c I can only be on it for so long. I have thought about trying Viagra for him but am worried about side effects (don't know a lot about it). I have tried not telling him when it's that time but that's difficult. I don't know how far you want to go but we invested in a porn channel to help DH get excited; seems to help a little. It really sucks that we can't just have sex like we used to. I get upset when he can't "make it happen" also and I know that I shouldn't and try not to but it's just so disappointing.


goerg - October 10

For Natural V, I bought it at a herbal supplement store in a shopping center..It shouldn't have any side-effect as herb. I don't know if it help or not...Medicine like Viarga does have side-effect..One of them is dizziness.


me - October 10

Hey everyone, please know that Viagara will help him get erect, but not ejaculate. Ejaculation is 50% or more mental. My advice is to try and not put so much pressure on yourselves (easier said than done right :) Try a sensual message and give yourselves plenty of time to let it develop into more (wink wink) during ovulation. I know it is frustrating. I am in the same boat. Best of luck to everyone! We WILL get pregnant!


maya - October 13

Thanks all for your replies. I am worried about Viagra, i don't know how to get him into the mood naturally and make him cum naturally i tried everything but it doesn't work.I guess the problem is with me also i can't talk stop talking about getting pregnant and ovulation etc etc first time when he failed i made a big deal out of it like if you are going to be like that i will never pregnant something like that. I guess i have to change my attitude and calm myself a little. Anyways goodluck to you all trying out there baby dust to you all.


To Maya - October 13

Then your DH should go to see an me..which will be soon..



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