2 questions...
10 Replies
tk07 - November 23

I was just curious to know how you ladies deal with people always asking you when you are going to be pregnant or if you are trying and then people always saying it will happen and just relax? i am like, relax! ok, you relax! i don't know i am just sad because of the holiday and all.
teh second question is that usually before my period i spot for up to 4 days prior, anybody else do that?
i am going to ask my dr next week about it, but i was just wondering!
thanks!!!!! and happy thanksgiving!


isa - November 23

noone asks me when i will get pg. I told people from the time i was married do not ask me. If i get pg i will tell you and everyone has left us alone (and thats been for 2 years now). If people told me to relax i'd give them the most wicked look and say did you really say that. How rude of you and walk away. spotting before af is usually old blood from your previous af if it is brown.


Cooper5450 - November 23

Hey tk07... I have heard it all. I used to just smile and not say anything but after 2 years of ttc I am tired of doing that. My friend did tell me a good line that will shut people us a lot so here it is "You asking me when I am going to get pregnant is like you asking me how many times my husband and I have sex and that is just none of your business" If you try that at a family gathering I am sure that it will make people think twice about asking you when again. The relax part is just something people say because they don't know what else to say. All I can say is that it is hard to answer anyone including family. Sometimes the littlest things will make me cry but I just try to stay positive. I thought that I was defective. When I met my RE he told me that I have to remember it isn't a question of "if" but a question of "When". I usually spot a few days before AF as well. My RE didn't say that there was anything wrong with that. Have a Happy Thanksgiving and try not to let anyone get to you!!!


ali d - November 23

Hi tk07, my periods were the same as yours - spotting for 4-5 days before..when I was trying ti conceive I also spoke with my Doctor who advised the 1st day of my period should begin on the 1st 'full blown' day (if you know what I mean). I did my charts from this and did actually conceive the 1st month - so in my case she was correct. I know everyone is different, but it's just a bit of advice that I received. Good Luck with TTC, and God Bless.


Tracy88 - November 23

I must be a different bird altogether because when people have asked me when we were going to get pregnant, I would just tell them I have been trying and we are apparently having some difficulty. People mean well when they ask you questions like that, so for me to get defensive just shows my own insecurity. People don't set out to offend you, they just don't word things the way they should to someone who is having trouble conceiving and sensitive to the subject. I used to get a little peaved when I heard the whole "relax" bit, so I would just say, I've tried that, it obviously didn't work for me. I found that when I was honest with people I'd get a lot of constructive feedback. I learned about my fertility doctor through my openness to discuss my struggles and I am now 14 and half weeks pregnant thanks to this guy. It's a really sensitive time for you right now. How you deal with others is up to you, but I found there was no point in putting more pressure on myself by keeping my struggle a secret. Now that I am pregnant, all the people who knew about me TTC are ten times happier for me and know what a miracle this is for me. Good luck and stay positive.


tonyaandjoe - November 24

they ask me that too and i say no but i am still ttc. and when i do it will be
awesome what good news.


tk07 - November 24

thank you for the responses! it always makes me feel better to know i am not alone with the way i feel about it all.
i think i am going to go the route of: yeah we are just letting it happen. Then i don't feel like there is pressure on me of the big when, but i am not lying either.
i made it through a holiday though not too bad, of course it was brought up a few times but they dropped it pretty quick so that is good! i just go through spurts of i am ok, then i get real down about it. i guess that is normal though. maybe the clomid is making me more emotional!
it didn't last time, but who knows!
sorry for the rambling, have a good rest of the holiday!


Tracy88 - November 24

My first month on clomid was a dream, but the second and third months were an absolute nightmare. I was emotional, moody and snappy. My husband knew he was walking on thin ice around me, but also knew it was the clomid making me the way I was because I was acting the opposite of my true personality. I like the way you answered people this time around and see how quickly they did drop the subject? People don't mean to be so assertive with their questions, they are just trying to make conversation. Glad you had a good holiday.


tk07 - November 24

Tracy88, did you get pregnant while on clomid? i am really hoping it works for me. i am only on cd7 in my second month. last month i had really bad hot flashes and only a couple this time so maybe the symptoms did switch a little!
i know that when people ask they are just asking what is new and general stuff for a couple that has been married for 2 years! somedays though i just don't want to be bothered with it. that is great you are 14 weeks along! you must be really excited, are you going to find out if it is a girl or boy?


Tracy88 - November 24

Unfortunately I did not get pregnant with clomid but my older sister did, so what works for one person may not work for another. My day21 progesterone levels on clomid were insanely high, so we knew the drug was working for me, we just didn't know why pregnancy never occurred. My lining could have been too thin or it could have been from one (or all) of the many things the doc discovered during laparoscopic surgery. I had the surgery a few months after getting off clomid. I was not broken, just needed some serious "house cleaning." Anyway, we did a cycle of injectable hormones with back to back IUI's a month after my surgery and got pg on the first try. I only spun my wheels on clomid for three cycles before moving on to a fertility specialist. I was under his care for four months before getting pregnant. At the time it seemed like an eternity, but in retrospect, it was just four short months. You know I also meant to say that my sister got PG on her second cycle of clomid, so just because it didn't work the first time, there is still hope. If that doesn't work for you, still don't give up hope because a cycle of injectables has worked for so many people I know that clomid did not work for. I will be finding out the gender of the baby, if the baby cooperates. I have an appointment for an ultrasound on Monday and it's possible that we may see it, but not probable. BUT then I have another ultrasound on Dec.11 which is a level 2, so they think they will be able to see it that day. I hope so, I would love to start looking in the right direction as far as shopping goes and naming the wee-one. I have a few names that I like, but refuse to get serious about it until I know what I'm having. Do you have your day21 progesterone level taken while on clomid, or does your doc do an ultrasound around cd10 to check your lining?


tk07 - November 25

Yeah, last month i had the u/s on cd12 and i had one follicle at 25 and another larger one but i don't know the size and he said my uterus was responding very nicely, so that was good news! and i had the 21 day test and it came back good too. but i do think that last month the clomid dried up my cm a little because i had a lot less so i got some preseed for this time around, i am hoping it helps. i have seen that a lot of people use it and like it.
well, i guess you had to go through all of that to get your baby but it was worth it huh?! i can't wait!



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