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nanw, hi i feel your pain. i had a miscarriage at 8 weeks in june 05 and in oct 05 i had a chemical pregnancy as you have experienced the past 3 months. please hang in there. i am now almost 7 weeks pregnant now. chemical pregnancies are said to be quite common. i did not think i would ever get pregnant and carry to full term. i am extremely nervous with this pregnancy, but theres is hope. most likely there is nothing wrong with you. if it happens again or it is really stressing you out, please go to a doctor and they might be able to run tests on you or somehing. good luck!!! hope it all works out for you.

ashlee, thanks for your support. I felt silly for being so upset as the m/cs were so early, this last time I was really a mess. You made me feel better. Had some blood tests today. Maybe will get an answer, but your right the doc agrees they probably won't find anything wrong. Will have a break this mth and start trying again. All the best with your pregnancy!

im so happy i could help. it doesnt matter how early or late you miscarried it is still very upsetting etiher way. you still had a life growing inside of you. dotn feel silly for being upset ok. they were the little cells that could have been. not trying to make you more upset but trying to understand and tell you how i felt with mine ok. and ofcourse ifs upsetting. i used to bawl my eyes out every time that i got my period because it was a reminder that i wasnt pregnant. and when i had my m/cs it was a hundred times worse because i finally had created a life and lost it. its ok to be upset. give urself a time to be upset and cry about it and do whatever you have to do that will make you feel a bit better. crying does help alot. youre allowed to cry. hope your bloodtests come back clear and i hope everything is fine. please do let me know how you go alright. my thoughts are with you. **baby dust**

Ashlee, I appreciate your answer to Nan. I hope you don't mind that I read it. After ttc for almost 2 years, and on my 5th round of Clomid, I found out on December 30 that I was pregnant. Well, Monday evening I miscarried. All of the thoughts you described have been flowing through me like a river. It's been less than 48 hours, but I didn't know I could have so many emotions. Nan, I agree with Ashlee totally. My baby was so REAL. As my body started to change, I welcomed the horrible side effects. The first symptom of my miscarriage was the decrease in pregnancy symptoms. Bleeding and cramping came after, but I already knew. Nothing I say can make it better, but I am thinking about and praying for you.

KJ, thats exactly what happened to me. Pregnant on dec 30th(my birthday) then bleed on mon. That was the 3rd in a row, so I lost the plot. I feel a bit better now, but have decided to have a break for at least a month. I always thought that you were either pregnant or not pregnant and with these chemical pregnancies it seems that you are a little bit pregnant and then not pregnant. The hormonal shifts make me feel horrible. you and ashlee know what I'm talking about. Sorry, I'm going on and on. Thanks for your support.

Nan, You have the RIGHT to go on and on! For 10 blissful days, we were pregnant! We felt our bodies change, and we mentally rearranged furniture and planned next Christmas! It's amazing what your mind can cover in a week and a half. We have a right to mourn our babies, and if we want to go on and on and cry at commercials and babies in strollers at the grocery store, I say we have every right. Please try and hang in there. I am think about and praying for you. I am going to take it easy for a little while. My OB/GYN suggested a couple of months to allow my body to "get back to normal" and then I am starting Clomid again. I was a paranoid wreck about this first pregnancy, I imagine next time, after all of this, I will be even worse!

*kj* ofcourse i dont mind you reading my post!! thats what its there for!! im glad to know that other people do feel the same as i do. im sorry about your miscarriage. Can i ask you what symptoms of your pregnancy decreased??? Because i am almost 7 weeks pregnant (i know i said that i was almost 7 weeks a week ago, but i went for a scan and they said that the bub only looks 6 weeks...uugh!! there was a hearbeat though) the thing is i had a bit of morning sickness and slightly tender boobs. now my morning sickness had vanished pretty much all together and im beginning to worry that its going to happen all over again. last tiem the only sypmtom i had was sore boobs and they only disappeared after the miscarriages.*NAN* Things will get better. i know its extremely hard at the moment, but they will get better. after my m/cs i had lost all hope in the world. i thought for some reason i was just never meant to be a mum. the thing is ALL THREE OF US HERE are mums no matter what. we are mums to our little angels in heaven. we will love them forever. a friend i met on another thread told me no matter what happens we are mums, and its true. so i thought id pass on her kind words through me. taking a month off might be a good thing, to give your body a rest and to put your stress levels down so you are as healthy as possible for your next pregnancy. i hope everything turns out for you!!

i agree with ashlee, it hurts eigther way, so iam sorry for your losses. this happened to me, once that i know of, though when we are not ttc, we could just be not even knowing we are having an early m/c, cause we aren't testing, and just feel like it's a bad period. right now we catch everything! good luck to you.

2 months after the miscarriage though, i got pregnant and had a healthy baby, so i wish you that to! you know you can get pregnant which is a big plus. best wishes for the new year. sherry

SHERRY, thanks for your message. I am so glad you went on after your m/c to have a healthy baby. Stories like your really help...I need all the hope and encouragement I can get! ASHLEE, as to my symptoms...My husband and I joked that I was going to have a boy because I was SOOOOO bloated and gassy. We said no sweet little girl could do that to her momma...it HAD to be a boy; I lived in the bathroom for a week!! Also, for the last 3 days before my m/c if you even looked at my breasts they ached. However, on Monday, even before the cramping began, I noticed that the bloating was gone and my breasts were less tender. Wow though! Your baby has a heartbeat! As you know, the m/c rate plummets once a heartbeat is detected! I wish you the very best. Keep us posted.

thanks kj. i just cant help but worry. i dont feel sick at all!!! whereas last week i did. dont know, maybe im just one of the lucky ones.... i deffinately will keep you guys posted. and if all stays well thats great news for all of you because really, if i can do it, anyone can. like i said i thought i was never meant to have a child. so dont anyone EVER give up hope!!!! according to my scan i am now 7 weeks today. this next 5 weeks heading into the second trimester are going to take FOREVER!! even thought there was a heartbeat still means i can miscarriage, that is why i am so worried. just think, someone who has a miscarriage at 10 weeks, had their baby had a heartbeat at some stage up until that 10 weeks. (unless ofcorse it was a missedmiscarriage) it just you still hear of lots of people having m/cs after six weeks, which means their baby still had a heartbeat at one stage. sorry for going on and on. im just terrified as im sure you could relate to when you are to fall pregnant again. i hope you fall pregnant again and everything turns out perfect!!! it will!!!! xoxoxox baby dust

Girls, thank-you for your posts. I cried when I read them, I cry at anything at the momment. I feel so down and your kind words of encouragement are helping me more than you know. Ashlee, I understand your concern, but just remember, you don't have to feel nauseated all of the time. I had NO nausea with my "successful" pregnancies, just sore boobs for the first 6 weeks, so hang in there sweetie, I wish I could give you girls hugs. As wonderful as my hubbie is, it feels more therapeutic to be able to communicate with women who have been through this. Thanks for being therexxxxooo

To all of you women, I'm sorry for all of your losses. I have had two losses and one healthy boy. I understand the pain and the anxiety with each pregnacy and loss. I am actually 12 1/2 weeks pregnant right now...still scared to death. I had two miscarriages in a row - one in January 2004...then the next in January 2005. It took about 9 months between each miscarriage to get pregnant again - actively trying. Because of my second loss...which was discovered at 10 weeks (it was a missed miscarriage...we had seen the h/b at 6 weeks 3 days, but apparantly the baby had died at 7weeks 1 day), he put me on progesterone supplements which helps with a luteal phase defect, I was not aware I had until the last m/c. I am still on the supplements and will continue till week 14. So for any of you who have had multiple or even one early m/c that could be culprit. The way I found out was by doing the opk's. I have a 28 day cycyle, but do not ovulate until like day 18 all the way up to day 20....that is why it has taken so long to get pregnant, and that is the reason, they think, for my past miscarriages. It's very devastating and frustrating. I will pray for all of you...Ashlee - everything looks good for you...just keep positive thoughts. One thing that has helped me since being able to hear the h/b with a doppler...is renting a doppler. That way I can hear the h/b every night if I want to help ease my anxiety. If you are worried at any point b/c of lack of symptoms...demand your doctor see you. Like the others have said though...sometimes the nausea, fatigue and bloating are not as bad as other times. Believe me, it has freaked me out this last time anytime I felt "good". But remember as well like Nan, her successful pregnancies were without the nausea, as was my first born.

ASHLEE, I understand about freaking out. The pregnancy I just lost was my first and only. After this, I imagine next time I will be ultra-paranoid and in a constant state of worry and anxiety! NAN, I pretty much cry all the time too. I went back to work yesterday, and those few who know are tip-toeing around me. It kind of helps to be back in the swing of things, but at the end of the day I was worn out! It's 1:30 p.m. my time now, and I could take a nap at my desk. I guess your emotional stress really takes a toll on your physical body as well. BECCA, congrats on making it to week 12! Keep us posted on how things are going for you.

Ladies, I have a question. As you know, I mc'd last Monday. My HCG the next day was 59. I had it done yesterday (6 days after the previous test), and it is exactly the same. I thought it would have dropped quite a bit by now, especially as much as I have been bleeding. My doc's office is not too worried; they just want me to test next Monday again. Do you guys have any clue?

Thanks KJ, I appreciate the well wishes. I'm still in disbelief and still trying not to get too excited! I think once I hit the 20 week mark and have the u/s to find out what we are having it will sink in full on!! Again I am so so sorry for your loss. It will definitely get better...I promise..not that you'll ever forget, but as time moves forward the pain lessens. As far as the HCG levels...ya know, they never took mine. I had my D&C on Jan 25th last year and by March 1st, which was exactly 5 weeks later, I had my first period. The bleeding after the D&C lasted about 1 1/2 weeks I'd say. There was like nothing really at first and then it started like 2 days post op. I would think your levels should go down soon though. It is the hardest thing, and I am so sorry you or anyone ever has to go thru it. I really am...I don't think other people really understand the loss a woman feels at any stage of pregnancy, whether it be 4 1/2 weeks or later...the loss is still very significant...like my husband said...it's not just the loss of the baby we had for a bit, it's the loss of that dream you had going on in your mind of how the rest of your life had been changed, in a good way. I totally understand. Sorry for going on and on, I don't think I really helped you at all...but I just feel for anyone who has gone thru this.